Circle to the left
Mary Anne and Wanda were the best of friends
All through their high school days
Left allemande, turn the partner by the right
Allemande left and you weave
After graduation Mary Anne went out
Searchin' for a bright new world
Swing, promenade
Wanda looked all around this town
And all she found was Earl

Now the heads gonna promenade travel halfway round the ring
Side pair you go right & left thru
You square thru and you count em go 4 hands
Around the ring to the corner do an eight chain four
It wasn't two weeks after they got married
Swing your corner lady, promenade
She put on dark glasses and long sleeved blouses
And make-up to cover the bruise

Well the heads gonna promenade travel halfway round the ring
Side pair you go right & left thru
You square thru and you count em go 4 hands
Around the ring to the corner do an eight chain four
She finally got the nerve to file for divorce
Swing with the corner lady, promenade
But Earl walked right through that restraining order
And you know what he did

Sides face grand square
Mary Anne got the word and flew in from Atlanta
On a red eye midnight flight
She held Wanda's hand and they worked out a plan
And it didn't take em long to decide
Circle left
Earl had to die
Na na na nah, Goodbye ... Earl
Allemande left, promenade
Goodbye ... Earl

Side pair gonna promenade halfway round the ring
Head pair you go right & left thru
Square thru and you count em go 4 hands
Around to the corner lady do an eight chain four
Well the cops came by to take Earl in
Swing the corner girl, promenade
Then they tipped their hats
And said "Thank you, ladies, if you hear from him let us know"

Why don't the sides promenade go halfway round the ring
Head pair you go right & left thru
You square thru and you count em go 4 hands
Around to the corner lady do an eight chain four
Well, the weeks went by and spring turned to summer
Swing your lady then promenade
It turns out Earl was a missing person
That nobody missed

Sides face grand square
So the girls bought some land and a roadside stand
Out on Highway 109
Selling Tennessee ham and strawberry jam
And they didn't lose sleep at night
Circle left
Earl had to die
Na na na nah, Goodbye ... Earl
Allemande left with the corner, promenade
Goodbye, Earl

And you bow to the partners and the corners too
Goodbye Earl